Feeling Dejected After Rejected for Employment?
It’s True. No doesn’t always mean no. It’s certainly not forever. Many Times we are so excited to get the interview we never expect the NO to come.
Find out How to Focus your Efforts on Moving Forward from Here
“No, Sorry, we went with another candidate that better met our requirements.”
That…is the phrase I hate hearing the most, especially when I don’t get any feedback. What are they really saying?
Whatever story is rolling around in your head, isn’t THEIR TRUTH, it’s yours. So, we get to the finals through all the interviews. And you hear that no. Don’t let said rejection deter or even alter your work with that company. Consider it temporary. Here’s why. There are so many variables outside your control that this occurrence shouldn’t change your efforts. Looking for work requires us to continue on, to build relationships, to identify opportunities, to be focused on the interview, and know ourselves well. There are many things in the hiring process that we don’t control:
the scheduling is outside our control
the internal process of hiring is outside our control
the health of the people interviewing us is outside our control.
So what do I do Andrew? If all these things are outside our control, what is inside our control?
Good news is here.
We control our environment
From how we look, our appearance, our smell, our posture, our manners. Everything we take care of in our physical makeup is totally in our control.
Interview preparation is in our control
How much time spent studying the company, studying the people on the interview team, practicing over and over answers to potential interview questions.
Pursuit of opportunities We Want
We control the opportunities we pursue and don’t pursue. It’s clear that we sometimes are in a pinch and really NEED a job. As much as we want something, we have the control over whether or not the company and it’s people fit us. Finding and understanding our values, philosophies, and how people should be treated.
We control our job search activities.
Every day we have a choice on what activities we participate in: applications, resume edits, networking, social media marketing, taking courses to improve our skills.
We control the response to different events
A rejection can be responded to with any manner of emotion. Sadness, joy, relief, humor, anger–all of which are reasonable responses to a given the situation.
What are we to do?
Focus on what we can control and minimize the things we can’t control. Beat yourself up over a no, not productive. In the last year, a gentleman I coached was down in the dumps after failing a coding interview as a software developer. However, I encouraged him to give it another try and that this no wasn’t really permanent. He agreed, but not wholeheartedly, and tested again. Wouldn’t you know it, he is now gainfully employed at his target company.
Recognize there are many influences vying for our attention in the job search process. Always in search of easier, better, quicker, faster, and low rejection activities followed by enticing promises to get something without any effort? Enter the cliche: If it sounds too good to be true, it probably is. Don’t fall for the shortcuts, the online programs, the easy fix. This process takes hard work, and there are roads that are easy paved with disappointment. The roads that are less traveled, require more work and are worth the effort.
Don’t jump to conclusions, or make assumptions. It’s far too easy to come up with excuses or reasons why you weren’t hired. Don’t fall for the “I’m too __” syndrome. I’m too old. I’m too educated. I’m too expensive. Reminds me of my kids as we close in on bedtime.
It’s not hard to believe, looking at my kids, that they sometimes don’t like each other or get along 100% of the time. There are some kids, and coworkers, and people in general that I just get along with better and therefore like them more. This is true in hiring too, be the person that is liked better. You know, often the person who gets hired is liked and therefore perceived as the candidate that is lowest risk. The familiarity of being a known commodity. It’s hard to be that person when all we do is online applications. Suggestion: build relationships with key members of a hiring team.
The BE’s:
BE the known quantity
BE the person that puts on a cloak of LOW RISK
BE the person who prepares well for any eventuality
BE the person who isn’t phased by a NO
BE the person, once you are hired, that maintains networking relationships for the rest of their career.
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